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Fellow Cardiff School of Art Alumni Charlotte, Sarah and Genevieve
Whilst there, I discovered that my chain-smoking neuroscientist ex-girlfriend Katherine has recently had her first child. Apparently she's called him 'Ivor'.
Middle name 'Tiger'.
Ivor Tiger
As in:
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I couldn't help but think:
'He could have been my child'.
Congratulations Katherine! I will send you a modified plug-in air freshener as a congratulatory gift.
And best of luck at primary school Ivor.
At around 2am I got a bit overwhelmed by cigarette smoke, so I went outside for a bit of fresh air. But then the bouncer wouldn't let me back in, so I had to wait around outside in the cold for about an hour until kick-out time. I made friends with the other people outside the club; drug dealers, illegal mini-cab drivers, and a Don't Panic! flyer man.
The Don't Panic! flyer man asked me to hold up a poster so he could take a photo. I drunkenly ageed, only to find out, after he'd photographed me, that the poster was for the motion picture Deuce Bigelow: European Gigolo.
I sincerely hope the photo never enters the public domain, else my career might go a bit Tessa Jowelly.
Although some would argue that it's far too late to start worrying about that now.
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